Saving your Marriage, Read here in case of Relationship Emergency
You smell the smoke, hear the crackle of a flame and
begin to faint from the searing heat.
and…
You suspect there’s about to be a raging fire.
But the fire and carnage you fear won’t be from
any material possessions lost, but from something much
more precious, a once loving relationship going up in flames.
No matter what problem set your fire blazing, many
of us don’t know where or how to begin applying
the water to put the fire out.
In fact…
Unlike a real fire where a fireman first looks to
find, attack and cool the source of the fire (if possible).
Often attacking the source of the heat isnt the right way to approach things
when trying to extinguish our relationship problems and fires.
Imagine that since this economic downturn
your relationship has flared up some worrying financial blazes.
Not too hard to imagine these days?
These may start as little brush fires, small issues and arguments
over how and where money is being spent…or not spent.
Then, maybe because of the heat and pressure of these
financial fires one partner starts ‘escaping’ more than
is healthy for the relationship.
He escapes into TV, Video Games, Alcohol, Cyber
Porn…or worse?
Now…what do we have?
We’ve got two fires smoldering away and soon to be a third because
the other member of the relationship is beginning to feel isolated and lonely.
Can you almost feel the pressure?
Feel it coming to a boil?
Now with three fires off to a crackling start there’s
even greater risk of fire and damage spreading to other areas.
So? Just which fire do we put out first?
Our financial fire? Our financial blaze feels pretty tough to
extinguish right now and not likely to die soon.
So maybe we should start with the escapism? That seems
like an easy blaze to put out…IF you’re not the one escaping!
…and try telling someone that’s feeling lonely and isolated
that “they should just snap out of it” is like throwing fuel
into the fire.
So where do we begin when we don’t see any
excellent place to begin? And we finally realize that
trying to stomp out all our blazes at once actually spreads
the fire?…FASTER!
The answer is…
Unlike fighting a REAL fire, we start where there
IS NO BLAZE.
Yes, start where there is no fire, smoke or heat
and no flame.
What we need to do here is to stop concentrating on the problem(s)
and put our concentration on where some passion still exists…even if
it’s just a little.
Find even the tiniest things you both enjoy doing
together, ACTIVELY put your problems aside and begin to
reawaken the passion between you.
And do you know what invariably happens? Often once you’ve
reignited the passion between you…the PROBLEMS will often work
themselves out.
The fires extinguish themselves.
Here’s how it may play out using our example;
Tom and Cindy both love cooking together.
They both actively decide to let their problems
go and NOT worry about them for awhile, but to start
by cooking meals together and sitting down to eat together
the dinner table…EVERY night.
Often because they’ve had such a great time cooking
and eating meals together…they place poker or another game
afterwards and share some laughs and have a little fun.
Now, Cindy isnt feeling so lonely anymore
Tom’s always watching TV or surfing the web…
That little bit of fun turns into love making a little
more often.
Which in part…leads to…
Tom starts to feel better about himself and a new self confidence starts growing
and as his confidence builds… Tom gets more assertive
about finding work.
Soon…
Tom lands what maybe not the best job in the world, but one
that relaxes a lot of the money stress until he
can find the perfect fit for him.
And before your very eyes…
Where Tom and Cindy’s relationship was about to burst
into flames…
Now, they are rising from the rubble with
a stronger and more fire proof marriage than ever before.
The moral of the story is that with enough PASSION
couples can overcome most any problem including surviving an affair, drug use,
even death in the family.
But when there is very little passion even the tiniest
problems…become big, out of control, blazing fires.
Now if you’re reading this, but feel that an out
of control fire has already ‘gutted’ and put an end to your
relationship. You may find it comforting to know that there
may be a fresh start for you? Saving my marriage may be a real possibility?
If you are in Tom and Cindys situation working on saving your marriage or trying to stop your divorce [or simply need some solid advice on relationships]visit my site for a POWERFUL AND EASY SEVEN STEP RENCONCILLIATION PROCESS.
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