Posts Tagged ‘rebound relationships’

Rebound Relationship Advice For Those Left Behind

What do you do when your partner is in a rebound relationship, even if your partner is still living at home and unaware that you know what’s going on?

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As time goes by in a relationship, either of the partners can begin to feel an urge to move on - it could be part of a mid life crisis where feelings of returning to a long lost youth raise their heads, or they’ve met a person who has caused a stir inside them - either way, they think that they must make a move before they’re too old to enjoy it.

Pushing your partner away can also make them start a rebound relationship, not just to stop thinking about you, but to improve their self confidence.

You must realize that blame is not for this situation, no matter who ended the relationship, if you still love each other the situation can be rectified.

So what do you do? Ending a relationship is emotionally exhausting, so at first just have some time to yourself (the reason for this will get apparent as we proceed), and don’t get angry with yourself, you need to be cool and calm at this time.

Next you have to think about the options open to you, there being two, of which the first is to go away and begin a rebound relationship yourself, but you must be prepared for complications further on up the road.

This may not be a good time for hypotheses, consider this:

It is recognised that there are four periods to any relationship, which are Forming, Storming, Norming and Performing.

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These stages happen to every relationship, and are central to understanding how you are going to win your partner back. The “Forming” phase is simply that, meeting, sharing common ground etc, then the “Storming”, where we might discover the less appealing parts of our prospective partner’s emotional make up (we
love them or leave them here!), the “Norming” phase where we decide to stay with this person, and if the good points outweigh the cons, the “Performing”period.

As your ex approaches the “storming” phase of their rebound relationship, you’re relaxing, preparing yourself to pick up the pieces.

People say opposites are attracted toeach other. It should not be a surprise if this is the case with your ex’s new partner and they are totally the opposite to you - this is your ex trying to make a point, and you may have to reinvent yourself a little to get them back.

The truth is, if your ex still has love for you (remember, rebound relationships are often to prove a point rather than the beginning of a deep and meaningful relationship), when they get to the storming stage they might well realise how much happier they were you were together.

Put your view of blame for the break up aside. Don’t be distant yet don’t over fussy either, be a grown up but not macho. Just
because their rebound relationship is ending, don’t rest on your laurels or play the blame game, this will send them straight back into their rebound relationship, no matter if they think there’s nothing long term there. Don’t go the other way and be desperately apologetic either.

Communication (or lack of it), is often the single cause as to why older relationships get into difficulties. Make sure that, as you recover your relationship, set aside time to communicate (and listen!) to each other. Little talking and listening can lead to separate lives.

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Is Your Relationship A Rebound Relationship?

There are many things that people go through when they have had a relationship break up for whatever reasons. Some people like to be left alone for sometime to reflect on the loss, but some other people go in the opposite direction. They are the ones that seek comfort in someone else as soon as they can. That is their way of healing, and it does not mean that they did not care about or are not morning the loss of the last relationship. When you are dating someone after a breakup, either yours or theirs, you want to know if you are in a rebound relationship or not.

You may think of a rebound relationship as one that starts after a long term one fails. That is true, but not all of them are going to end badly. However, many of them do. What happens is that someone goes for the opposite of the person they were just with in the hopes that this will help them forget and heal faster. It never works, but that is what they are trying to do. If they are not the person who wanted to end the romance, they possibly may go into a rebound relationship with someone who reminded them of the previous person they just lost.

Because of this, rebound relationships are often based on things that do not make for a long term relationship. If you jump into the arms of another to feel safe and loved, even though you have not mourned the one you just ended, you are not seeing that person for who they really are. Big problems can happen in such a rebound relationship. One of the most obvious is that they usually end up talking forever about the relationship that just came to an end, and the other person is left to feel that they are not over that other person. If this occurs, they are correct and the relationship ends.

If you think that you are in a rebound relationship with someone, ask yourself a few questions. Have you moved in to quickly? If you are trying to get really close to the other really quickly, you could be setting yourself up to get hurt. Eventually, they are going to get spooked. If someone is always talking about the ex, you should realize that this could go on for a long time. You have to decide if you can pull back a little and be more of a friend until the other person has healed. If not, you’re going to get your feelings hurt and heart busted into pieces. Make your pick accordingly.

Those people who leap from one lover to another, and have found themselves in a rebound relationship have to consider what they are doing. They should make sure they are honest about just getting out of something and not being over it. That can let someone else conclude if they are really up for a relationship that may not end well. There becomes a time when the emotions of others have to be a higher priority then the need to find comfort in someone else you know you are probably going to make suffer.